Chapter Two:
Do I truly live in the knowledge that this day could be my last? How differently I would live! I’m so foolish because in a sense I live as if my days will never end, rather than the reality that my days are numbered, are short, are just a vapor- if I kept this fresh in my mind, I KNOW I would treat my moments with more care and my words would have more meaning, my impact for Christ would seem more important and the sense of urgency would and should be more real to me everyday.
Worry and Stress can be huge distractions of life that also can steal our very health…even our life for that matter! It reminded me of the little faith I have at times, and they joy I forfeit often when I choose to get all worried and stressed rather than know in good faith God can be trusted and depended upon in all circumstances.
I didn’t realize how often I get so wrapped up in “my” own life rather than continually seeking what God has for my life since my life is his in the first place. That it is about Him not me. If I believe this in my heart, shouldn’t I reflect that with my life? I am being called out on the floor in this chapter, and its things that I seriously need to look at, deal with, and pray about! Praise God for this chapter though, whether it hurts to have God root those “impurities” out or not, this NEEDS to happen!!! If not dealt with it would be detrimental and affect my life negatively had I not been called out on the floor with these reality checks!
I know I am just an ordinary person, but ask this day that God will use me and work his miracles through our family to show his glory and lead others to the truth of how much God loves the world! I love how honestly raw he is “get over yourself”. This is SO true, shall I live my 2/5ths of a second being open to His calling in my life, or shall I waste this short life and and the blessings I have been given and just squander my life away for myself?
Wow, the thought “Does your life point to Him” pops out to me today…speaking to my heart so strongly! Does it? Am I living the “safe” life, or am I willing to risk it all for the glory of God doing whatever he calls me to do living fully for Him. My heart and my love, are they fully dedicated to Him first and foremost…this resonates in my spirit as I read chapter two.
Am I ready to go just yet, mostly no, not because I fear death or heaven…I am SO excited of the thought of Gods eternal reward for those who truly love Him. But I’ve done so little for him thus far…I feel so small…Lord help me and work through me! I know it’s not by works that I am saved, but I still long to serve Him more fully! I want to do more in the sense of making myself available, willing and ready upon his request…but my focus needs to be in the right place so I can actually HEAR him!!! Lord help me to HEAR you, and then in obedience do whatever it is you request of me…no matter what the world thinks or has to say on the matter!
The essay written by the 12 year old girl was such a blessing to me! Am I preparing the way…paving a clear road for my children to follow, to challenge them to love Him more deeply, and be willing to risk all for the sake of Christ, to take up my cross and follow him?! Something that jumped out at me in this essay is her CHOICE to be joyful, to choose to focus on others and minister to others. In this “me” first world this opposite reaction can only be accomplished with Christ’s help and our loving Him so much that we can’t help but want to choose this life to be completely abandoned to the heart of god (what hurts him should hurts me also) having his heart overflowing out of us to bless others with. Am I choosing to be a “history maker” as this young girl states? Or am I just choosing to learn about those who lived before me and those who love and serve him, but playing it safe on the sidelines occasionally jumping in the game and “doing my best” rather than God’s best for my life. He can use me, us, this study, to transform our hearts and lives….this is just an incredibly exciting thought that overwhelms me with emotions right now! Use me Lord, I want to risk it all for your glory!
This house of mourning section made me thinking of this great movie that EVERYONE should go out and buy and give to others to bless them with as well! It’s called, “the Secrets of Jonathan Sperry”. It focuses on a older gentlemen who disciples a group of young teens who all live in the same neighborhood. As the movie goes along their hearts and lives are transformed by the word of God, and they begin to impact others around them for Christ. It shows that just one person’s life matters so much, and being willing to speak up for God can make a huge impact on another’s life! That God can use anyone at any age (young or old). Through my laughter and tears this movie taught me so much, and is a powerful movie to be enjoyed by the WHOLE family.
I want my funeral to be a celebration, not just of my homecoming to my real home, but of what God can do if a person is willing to make themselves available to God no matter what! Showing his glory and greatness through my weakness! I don’t want to waste anymore time stressing and worrying about what’s next, but rather, claim the joy of what God has given me and the excitement of what is to come…being open and willing to all that He has for me next. Is God really “everything” to me or shall I continue in this illusion that I love him and put him first when in reality I am VERY selfish and live as if I have 100 more years left to serve him. The realty that life is short is real to me at this moment, and I want to live fully EVERY second of the day loving as Jesus loved, living as Jesus lived, having a heart for others….Lord help me on this journey that you have set before me! I know because you have warned me that Satan is real and when he knows there is danger of growth in you he attacks..so strengthen me during this time that I may be under attack of Satan. I know he wants me to live the safe life and be on the sidelines for you….but you can protect me from his attacks and move me safely to the frontlines!
Chapter 2 Question of the week: If today was my last what would I regret…what am I wanting to change so I will not continue to have these regrets?
I feel I have gone over a few of these above. However, the main ones are: living the complacent safe life that doesn’t truly put Christ first. I can NO longer live in this illusion that life goes on forever (though I know its short in some ways) I need to live with the sense of urgency of this being my last day and making the very most of it, listening for the heart of God so that he can direct my path….my self run life has gone on for TOO LONG, and this needs to stop immediately. Wow! I feel like I’m a toddler in Christ right now and he is reprimanding me in some sense…thank you Jesus for this because I need you to set my path straight before I waste another day, another week, another year….forgive all the past up opportunities that I didn’t even see because I was too wrapped up in my own life or that I past up because I said “no, not today, I’m too busy”! My heart aches for those lost moments to have served you more fully, let me not continue in that way of living! I need your help, you to work in and through me for this “new” life to become a reality!
First of all, great job with the blog Amber!! And thanks for setting this up. Sorry I've been behind a bit. I haven't yet read this post yet, I wanted to post my thoughts first and then read yours. So to me chapter two was not necessarily confirmation, but more like a reminder of trusting God with all things. I finished up a Bible study a couple of months ago at church and there were a couple of things I learned that I just love. Of course, as put in the book and you were saying, amnesia sets in and I need to be reminded of these things periodically. One is that God wants ALL of our problems. Not just the big stuff. He wants it ALL! For so long I would only turn to him for the things I didn't think I could do on my own. But I've learned that He wants me to turn to Him for EVERYTHING. I honestly think I use to believe that I would be bothering Him with petty things so I only gave Him the big stuff. But now I find myself calling out to Him many times during the day for simple little things. Of course I still have stress and worries, but I'm constently reminded that He's got this! I just need to give it to Him.
ReplyDeleteAnother thing this chapter reminded me of is the scripture from Ephesians 3:20-21...(paraphrased-God can do above and beyond OUR above and beyond!!) How awesome is that?!! If you can imagine in your wildest dreams something, He can do immeasurably more than that! I LOVE that! So when I am worried about things I know I can pray over these words and know that God's got this! For example, as you may know, Jimmy had to have his appendix out last Thursday night. Not something we saw coming. In fact, we had plans to spend this past weekend at the beach celebrating Hannah's birthday. But those plans were changed and now Jimmy is out of work for two to three weeks. He called work yesterday to see what he has to do about getting his short term disability, but unfortunatly he does not have that. He's been paying for long term disability and his work gives you short term disability but only after you've been there for a year. He is one month and one week shy of being there a year! Yes, panic set in along with stress and anxiousness, but I'm counting on God to deliver these promises because I know that He can do above and beyond my above and beyond! I can't wait for this testimony to come to light!
On page 44 of the book he talks about 1 Corinthians 10:31. I really like this scripture too and I like to use this scripture in teaching my children to do things for His glory whether it's doing schoolwork, a dance recital, or a soccer game, or maybe just helping with chores. It's great to remember this verse when we are doing those mundane (is that the right word?) things we might not enjoy doing, but we should be greatful that we can do them and do them for Him. Also I tell them that we are all blessed with different abilities and when we use these abilities let His glory be seen. My prayer is that they grow up doing something they love, but that they will always remember where their gifts come from and praise Him for those.
My last thought on this chapter is from Matthew 10:32-33, I want to acknowledge God before men and take every opportunity I can to tell others about Him. I don't do that like I should at all, but I need to. And this scripture rung reminders in my ear. The author of this book said some people waste their lives...I don't want to waste mine!
As far as question #2...I think the one thing I regret is not praying more as a family together. I take time and pray with my girls individually everyday, but as a family we don't pray together enough. I feel like we need to come together more and pray together for issues that affect us as a family instead of me praying one on one with the girls.
Chapter Two
ReplyDeleteThis chapter makes me realize how difficult it is to stay focused on what really matters. I know that any day could be the last, but as you said Amber, I rarely live this way. I often wake up and go to bed with my to do list that shamefully does not hardly ever have things to do for GOD. I know it is ALL ABOUT HIM! It is my desire to truly make HIM and let HIM be the Head of my life, my daily life; but... No good excuses. I know that I cannot live without HIM. I need HIM every day and every hour and every second of the day. HELP me to begin my day and end my day with HIM. In doing this, I am sure that I will be more conscious of HIM as the day goes along. One of the blessings of homeschooling is the Bible reading/study I get to do with my children on an almost daily basis. This has helped me get in to HIS Word, when honestly, I may not have otherwise. Also sharing the Word at a noon-day Bible study almost weekly helps to get in HIS Word. It should not be a chore to read His Word and to study His Word, to pray to the ONE who loves me with a crqazy love but with the bombardment of distractions, it takes discipline.
I do love the LORD and I desire to show HIM more my actions.